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Friday, January 20, 2012

Judgement.

Judgments. I have acknowledge my flaws but why do you have to do it for me? What drives you to blame for what I did? I shelter beneath my delicate pride as your venom spit out of your voracious mouth. I have already controlled by my own sorrow and yet you bested me with my weaknesses.
Sometimes I find myself defeated by these excessive conviction. You cannot find the truth in my existence if your eyes widened with self loathing. I won’t reiterate the immerse failure of your imitation. I won’t lose myself over something that is so frivolous.
Call me a fake. It is nothing but a lie. I will never have the kinds like you by my side because my name will be another excuse for you to grovel in the ill will you called a life.
Nothing can stop me. Not even the fires of envy blaze undying as this innocence is destroyed. These caustic embers yet remain soon to be blown away. You will choke on my name. You will choke of what you have said. I won’t succumb to your pettiness because you are machines of vengeance.
So you talk it but do you even know it? It’s such a reoccurring nightmare when you have become another victim of your deception. I can barely suppress my elation as you are failing in tantrum of hatred. You judged me but now I can see that you are me.




thanks for reading (:

Friday, January 13, 2012

Um. Need Some Useful Advice Here.


Hi I'm back for a while. It all happen in a blink of an eye. I dont know. It might be the one for me, but it might be not. I'm scared. This is tough. This is hard. Will I able to do it? Its not about trying, its about doing it or not doing it. I dont know. I want to talk about it to someone, but who? I dont know. I just want to be home. And being alone again.

Thats the best for me for a couple of days, maybe. MAYBE.




thanks for reading (:

Friday, January 6, 2012

Undefined.

I can't tell you what my glitch is. I just can't seem to figure it out. I am hoping that the next few days gives some clarity. That would be really great. I don't know what I am doing here, people. It feels like I am losing my mind sometimes. I have to be honest. I am wondering what the reasoning is. Why did I do this? What it some selfish attempt at being a hero to people here? I don't know. I just need some definition to all of this emotional chaos.



thanks for reading (:

Sunday, January 1, 2012

New Year With New Beginnings


I just wanted to say that I am very glad that Allah has blessed me with all He has. I love doing what I do and I love being who I am. I see the little things that are so great in my life: the love and support of amazing family, dearest friends, the protection of Allah, and the peace I have in the promise that Allah's plan is to prosper me.

These are great things. And I am very glad for it all. Is it perfect? Not a chance. But I am learning every day the value of staying committed to one's goal. It's something I never grasped before and something that is very important for me to learn. I am also learning a lot about being in a relationship-a healthy one-that's growing.




thanks for reading (:

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